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So I woke up this morning feeling a little flat and upset. I guess because I realised that this journey to recovery was and is going to be somewhat harder than I thought. My beautiful bf knew that something was up so he began the morning with you are so beautiful over and over again giving me the those gorgeous squeezy hugs. I was in my close minded captured mood, he suggested I go for a walk, he reminded me that as I walk to recite "I am so blessed"
walking to the lake I was looking at my feet, it was cold, I began to say "I am so blessed" but tears began to fall from my eyes, I pulled the hood over my head and continued to walk. I got to the lake all of a sudden something came over me, these feelings of sadness and frustration had to go , I turned around to walk back down the hill, the sun beamed into my eyes, all of a sudden this wave of optimism came over me , its like I left something at the lake this morning and that I really wanted today to be a new beginning.
Getting over something like this is definitely a challenge. Food/diet and my health has really overtaken my life and become something that is on my mind constantly. Completely consuming me.
I want to go back to the days where food was just something that brought people together, something to celebrate and enjoy with those that you love, when food was a fuel source that would give you the ability to run and run all day untill you were finally exhausted.
Now it is linked to something deeper in our adult selves, the determination of our overall appearance and health. Eating healthily ultimately can maximise your health and keep you feeling great on the inside and outside, where eating poorly can put food in a role where it is merely something that you put in your mouth, without there being a conscious recognition of its ability to determine your health, and whilst doing this, the feelings of tiredness and other conditions directly related to your diet just become a "norm" and daily feeling you put up with.
Some where in between those two styles of "eating habits" if you will is a place where you truly need to find a happy medium. Where food plays a role where it is sitting in the passenger seat and you are the driver
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